From one perspective it seems that He appears to treat people differently and even show favouritism. The truth is He show no partiality at all, certainly not concerning grace. What seems unfair is perfectly fair. It is our own stubbornness and unbelief that negates the power of His grace towards us. A humble and contrite heart He will never turn away. It is your heart He is looking at. His grace will be for those who honour Him and love Him from the heart.
There is a measure of grace given at the cross for everyone. He cannot force anyone to receive this grace and neither can you. He is searching for those who are willing to surrender their lives in order to receive the grace that is available. Only the truly hungry will be fed.
It is difficult to experience true hunger because food is all around us. This isn’t about food, this is about what dominates and fills your thoughts and occupies your time and what you busy yourself with. This can just as easily be christian activities or your job or a hobby or just entertainment. There is no shortage of things to fill your time. Even reading and listening can replace the seeking and waiting. Just don’t delude yourself with busy activity and call it being productive. Sometimes He just wants you to sit at His feet. Also don’t be distracted by comparing your circumstances with others. Measuring your performance is not an indicator of your spirituality or self-worth. You are already of immeasurable worth to Him even before you were born so nothing you can do can add to that.
As you search to discover His goodness be encouraged by what you read, hear and see but do not stop there. Make it your goal to see His glory for yourself in your life. In so doing you bring it into this world. Endeavour to find out what His will is and what His heart’s desire is for you, discover that and you have discovered the meaning and purpose of your life. That is the journey you are on. It is a voyage of discovery. Do not just follow the herd because the chances are they don’t know where they are going either. Those at the front will even think they are going in the right direction because so many are following.
The pressure is on and you may be made to feel guilty if you don’t follow the crowd. It can make you afraid of thinking for yourself. It feels safer to believe what everyone else is believing. He wants you to work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of a loving God. The fear of God is healthy and brings great wisdom and eternal rewards. On the other hand being indifferent to Him and being apathetic about His kingdom rule and reign is not the healthy option.